queen of England
" Come over here, I found it" I said. " the crown of England" oh goody, now can we leave? oh no. Beep beep beep the alarm has gone off.
There they are! Run, his way! grab the oranges and go."Got them," I replied.We went steaming down the hall, then we stopped and left shoe marks on the floor. Over there, I saw a coat, "how is that going to help us?" catching my breath,"hop on my shoulders,"I said. You thought you could trick us? give back the crown and leave."Its okay at least we have the oranges".
A great way to start your story with action and some intrigue by not telling the reader right away what you found. The Crown of England should all be capitalized. Also you are missing some quotation marks for speaking parts. The ending is confusing as you are missing some details of who is speaking and what is happening.
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